These days if someone asks for advice on how to meet people or make friends one of the answers they're likely to get is 'Try Meetup.com'. In case you don't know, Meetup.com has listings for all kinds of local social groups. Anyone can create a group and announce its upcoming get togethers. Other users can become members of the group and attend events. Some groups are based around activities like going on hikes or playing board games. Others are more purely social, and a meet up might be gathering at a local restaurant to chat. It's free to use if you're browsing for events. You only have to pay if you host a group yourself.

Some people have never tried meeting friends through a website or app before. It feels a tad odd and foreign, so they're unsure about whether it works for that reason. Other people are skeptical because they've already been to a Meetup.com event or two and it didn't work out. They're wondering if they should give it another chance.

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In this article I'll share my thoughts on how useful Meetup.com is for building a social circle. For the record, I've been to plenty of meet ups and have made some good friends through them. I'll discuss its pros and cons, and share some thoughts on how to approach the site to get the most out of it. I'll talk in terms of showing up to other people's events. Creating a group and hosting your own gatherings is also an option, but that's its own topic.

Meetup.com is simply a way to meet people

So does the site work for making friends? Yeah, in the sense that it's just one option of many to put yourself around new people. You can potentially make friends, or not, through any method of meeting people, whether it's a Meetup.com pub night, a volunteer position, or a figure drawing class. And once you've met someone you might click with them, or you might not, depending on all kinds of factors. That all seems obvious, but I still wanted to mention it.

Benefits of Meetup.com

Okay, so the site can help you make friends in the basic sense that it lets you meet people. It also has a few unique benefits that can facilitate friendships:

It lets you easily attend lots of social events - Don't have any plans on Monday and Thursday evening? Just see what's on Meetup.com, pick some events that seem interesting, then go to them. A few meet ups have a wait list or require some pre-planning, but for most you just have to show up. Many other methods of meeting people require more preparation and commitment, like needing to register and pay for an art class months before it starts, or having to do a bunch of paperwork and background checks to volunteer somewhere.
Most of the people at Meetup.com get togethers are open to making friends - That is what the site is for. It's not like starting a new job, where a good chunk of your co-workers may be too busy with their families or existing friends, and not interested hanging out. It's not like trying to chat to strangers at a concert, where many people are only there to see the show.
It lets you search for groups based on your interests - That increases the chance you'll end up at events where you'll have a good time and meet people you're compatible with. There are groups for all kinds of things, such as camping, trying new restaurants, badminton, discussing philosophy, dancing, tarot cards, and tabletop games. Of course, not every hobby will be represented in every town, but overall there's a good mix.
It has member profiles to help you connect with people - If you go to a meet up and get along with someone, but didn't get their contact information that day, you can send them a message through the site. Not every member checks their messages, but it can be a way to follow up with someone when you otherwise wouldn't be able to.

The site can also help you socially in other ways:

It's a way to try new things - There might be a meet up to take a free drumming circle class, or go bird watching, or see a stand-up comedy show. If you've never done any of those activities before this can be as good a reason as any to try them. You might meet some people while you're at it. If not, at least you had an interesting experience, and maybe gained something to talk about down the road.
It's a good place to practice your social skills - Meetup.com lets you meet and chat to a variety of people. It's a convenient, accessible place to practice skills like making making small talk, listening, or joining group conversations.
Meetup.com is a good way to get little doses of human contact if your social life is still a work in progress - You've just moved to town and are feeling lonely. Ideally you'd like to have a solid group of friends. However, sometimes even if you work at it that won't fall into place right away. In the meantime going to the odd meet up can tide you over and keep you from feeling totally isolated. You may go to a pub night or hike and make some friendly chit chat with some other attendees. Even if those conversations don't lead to any ongoing friendships, they can keep you from feeling like you never get to spend time with anyone.

Some drawbacks or complaints about using Meetup.com

Meetup.com isn't perfect. Some people have more success with it than others. Below I'll address some common complaints about events organized through it, and give some tips where I can for getting around those issues.

Meetup.com isn't busy enough in some areas

The site depends on its users to create groups and host events. https://evermundo.amebaownd.com/posts/22986371. It's more established in some places than others. It has a presence in many cities and bigger towns. There may not be something that's exactly to your taste every week, but there's enough going on.

Smaller towns are more hit or miss, like for many social options. However, if you have a car and are willing to travel, there may be enough going on in your larger multi-town region.

Meetup.com is better for people in their mid-twenties and up

A common complaint about the site is, 'I went to a few meet ups and everyone was way older than me'. Meetup.com is for adults of any age, so some groups will skew toward members who are middle aged. Overall, most of its users are in their mid-twenties and older. Which makes sense since that's when people can no longer meet friends through high school or college.

If you're younger it's still possible to make friends through the site, but the numbers aren't in your favor. One thing you can do is look for groups that are specifically for a younger age range. It can also help to be open-minded about the ages of the people you could befriend, or at least socialize with. Sure, most of us prefer to have a group of closer friends who are around our age. But if you just want to go on the occasional hike, do the people you do it with have to be born within three years of you?

You won't meet people you click with at every event

As I wrote earlier, Meetup.com is just a way to put yourself in the presence of new people. You won't hit it off with all of them. Sometimes you'll go to a few events in a row and not feel a connection with anyone. This is more likely to happen at very general meet ups, where the only thing everyone might have in common is that they live in the same area, or that they enjoy the same broadly-appealing activity like walking or eating food.

It can help to go to more targeted, interest-specific get togethers. It's also useful to accept you're playing a numbers game, and that just because you didn't meet anyone at the last meet up or two, it doesn't mean

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